romanglass (romanglass) wrote in magne_f,
romanglass
romanglass
magne_f

fixed and on the mend

You know how you can hear a song 100 times, and suddenly on the 101st listen, something new clicks for you?

A while back I saw Coldplay in concert, and when they played 'Fix You' - a song I've always liked but never connected with especially - something finally clicked. For the first time, I really thought about what that song means: the idea there are things in life that leave wounds and holes/voids and little broken places inside us at one time or another; and also the belief that it can be possible to 'fix' someone you love when they're struggling to heal the wounds they got from - well - life.

I've long had the impression that we're all walking wounded at different times in our lives. This is often purely internal, because unless you know someone's particular situation, you probably don't know that they're dealing with the constant throb of grief in their heart, or the piercing pain of regret, or the crippling anxiety over how they'll find a way to pay bills every month, or any number of other things that can leave them incomplete/broken/lost. So when you meet someone who is complaining in line at the grocery store, or driving 10 miles below the speed limit during rush hour, or not really listening when you're talking to them at work - maybe, just maybe, they are one of these walking wounded, and they need a little extra understanding at that time. We could all use a little more understanding at times.

And people don't go around telling people about their wounds, we don't share these burdens with those we encounter randomly in our daily life. We try to function as usual, carry on, find strength where we can, and downplay whatever needs 'fixing', especially if it is not something we can fix by ourselves, or if we're aware that the people around us have their own life wounds to deal with. Even among dearest loved ones, we put our best face on and act like we're doing better than we are, because we don't want to cause anyone else pain or concern.

It is a beautiful idea, then, that loving someone means knowing without words what's in their heart that may be pulling them down, and being ready to do what it takes to try to heal those wounds for them.

So after finally connecting with 'Fix You', I naturally came back to the refrain from 'That's The Thing About Us':

in nine seconds or less
we'll be free from this cosmic mess

and nine times i'll pretend
that i've been fixed
and i'm on the mend

that's the thing about us
we find love in chaos


I always had a clear idea of what I thought this meant, that these two have tried over and over to make things work, and somehow carried on with life alone when they didn't succeed. And yet the love and longing is still there, as deep as ever, despite those disappointments. But it wasn't until I had that little 'Fix You' revelation that I began to think about it more:

What kind of devotion must there be in a heart that is strong enough to try so many times, and never completely lose hope?
Is trying over and over eventually going to break down their love? Or as the love withstands all these trials, is it growing stronger?
And the rather obvious: What is keeping them apart, time after time?
Is it outside circumstance (meaning something they cannot control and therefore possibly of indefinite nature = tragic) or their own inability to finally take the leap (meaning something they can theoretically control and change with a split decision = hopeful)?

Despite the rather solemn lyrics, I get the sense that a future together is out there; after all this is a duet and they're both on exactly the same page in this romance ('we find love in chaos'). They've had a tough time of it, of course it's easy to love someone when things are rosy and new, but the deeper love comes when you trust each other enough to stop pretending, to see each other's wounds in the light of day, and strive together to become whole again.

Since the last time I wrote about this song, we found out that it was co-written by Lowell and Martin when they were working together last year, which is interesting because we don't know who wrote any other Apparatjik songs. She must have been able to 'get' the mythology quickly in order to co-write a chapter of the story so well; I still feel that there is a very complex and beautiful relationship implied here, and it still seems like a very realistic situation, despite the fact that it's part of a myth.

Here's a perfect example - there is a great song called 'She Got The Honey' by Mat Kearney (go listen, it's awesome!) that reminds me so much of the story in 'That's The Thing About Us'. Here are the lyrics, see if you agree:

Says she likes me to all of her friends
Cold shoulders what she pretends
I buy Americano every morning
Rings me up and winks with no warning
At the park with nobody else
Purple boots and her basquiot belt
Lights up when she sees my face
Turns red as she's turning away

All I ever know baby
All these games that you're playing
You keep driving me crazy
Gonna get there get there

She got the honey and I got some money to buy her a big bouquet
She got the loving and leaves me with nothing I just don't know what to say
Well I'd beg, steal and borrow if tomorrow she'd stay
She got the honey I don't think it's funny that she keeps walking away
Back to the beginning

Saw her down at the de la show
Walking in looking down at ther toes
Tall like a flower on the wall
High heal stealing looks across the hall
I walk up she's turning real red now
Deep breath hi how you doing wow
Caught you catch the corner of my eye
She got a call gotta go goodbye
We're gonna get there get there

She got the honey and I got some money to buy her a big bouquet
She got the loving and leaves me with nothing I just don't know what to say
Well I'd beg, steal and borrow if tomorrow she'd stay
She got the honey I don't think it's funny that she keeps walking away
Back to the beginning

It's amazing that I could be standing tall
It's like a million lightening bolts
When she walks right through the door
Crazy every little way I fall, I come crashing down
We're gonna get there get there

(lyrics copied from Metro Lyrics, so they might be slightly off)
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